Peace and Healing

My last post~ I *Wanted* to be Amish; it is just a smidgen of who I have become today. It's part of my history.

I am convinced that all of human life on this earth are in pursuit of something, and that is "peace".

Peace is such a pretty word too. Whenever I hear it, I always think of soft breezes, the warm glow of the late afternoon sun. The smell of jasmine wafting in the breeze. Children laughing and playing the neighborhood as an occasional dog barks.

Or I think of a log cabin with smoke drifting out of it's chimney in the twilight hours. Horses grazing and hearing the "munch munch" sound.

But reality is....it isn't *always* that picture perfect.

I am *such* an idealistic perfectionist, that when I "grew up" I had a pretty hard blow to my head when I entered "reality".

Before I entered life in the world of cruelty, I think I was a bit like Anne Shirley. But Anne kept her "dreamy" ways despite the hard cruel world. And there was no Mariella to firmly but gently help guide me back to the "real world". ;-)

So. I didn't stay in my "dreamy" ways after adulthood. In fact, to be blunt and honest. I about lost my mind. ;-) My little duckies didn't all line up in a row. In fact, they were stubborn little things! Most of the swam in directions that I wasn't anticipating and others out right flew away from me! (The ducks being my " idealistic dreams") And my imagination just wouldn't cooperate. (Like Ann, no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't seem to imagine her red hair away)

I have a very strong sense of "right" and "wrong", "truth" and "lies".

And if there was any breech in these qualities, in my own character, my idealistic perfectionism would take over, and my conscience would be overwhelmingly guilty. I couldn't seem to imagine away the wrong that I had done either. Nor did I feel I had the right to imagine away my guilt. That too would be a sin.

My idealistic perfectionism geared towards my "spiritual life". At first, the spiritual walk that I had chosen seemed to be working quite well.

But as time went on, my mind began to become affected with wrong thinking about myself and about God himself, and it lead into a deep, dark, and l-o-n-g depression.

Finally, after what seemed forever, I found peace. But despite the fact that I had peace, I needed to "heal" from some major wounds. Some of those wounds I had inflicted upon myself, and some wounds, from others who ignorantly wounded me.

But the funny thing is...all of us humans... all of us on the journey to find real peace, we also seem to need some kind of "healing" as well.

My story is different than yours I am sure. But I am also sure that almost everyone that I come in contact with has a story. And most of the time that story involves pain from wounds in their past.

The good news is...there is hope. There *is* healing.

Luke 4:18
The Spirit of the Lord [is] upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised,